Say something, I'm giving up on you.

Happy new year folks!

A brand new year has just started. New year, new beginnings. And maybe, new endings as well.

When 2014 arrived, it also meant that I'm gonna be a year older again pretty soon. And slowly creeping to the big 3. Darn, I feel old.

Recently, I had some conversations with friends, colleagues about relationships, marriage and such.

Few years ago, while in uni (and maybe in poly as well), one of the reasons I'm hesitant in starting a relationship with someone is that I haven't start to earn; that I believe I wasn't financially competent yet. Yes, theoretically, money shouldn't be in the way of love. But realistically, you'll need them to keep a relationship alive.

Now, after working for over a year, I guess I could say that I'm financially stable. But yet, there's still something that holds me back from exploring and trying out opportunities given to me. It's like I'm afraid to step into something which is fairly unknown to me.

Maybe there's something inside me that holds onto something and hasn't fully let go yet. Maybe I'm still waiting and hoping for a certain thing which in the end, I know I'll probably won't get. 

Or maybe I'm just someone who yearns for something and when presented with an opportunity, I don't know what to do with it. And yes, that's something that I need to work on.

Unkept words, broken promises..